Caramel Pecan Praline

Even though I'm writing this on a Thursday and this will be published in time, it's also unfalsifiably true that I completely forgot to do this today. I was in bed, lights off, phone in hand (the traditional set of circumstances for within-30-seconds-of-being-dead-asleep amongst the middle aged in 2023) when just opening Safari to look up memes featuring raccoons reminded me that I hadn't done this yet. And it's Thanksgiving, America's holiday where we celebrate an endless series of chores, a hallowing of meniality and prosaity by ritual and sacrifice: time and energy if you're the one serving, a bit more if you're the turkey.

It's been a mixed bag, frankly, and I'm on the exhausted side. A full few days of food prep, food execution, food demolition and food recovery has been a bit taxing, as much for my dishwasher (a literal household appliance, not a euphemism for any human associated with my household) as it has been for me. Add to that that I'm suffering a bit from a fresh sting of rebuke and the prospect of starting from zero (again) in the romantic department has dragged a few fresh drops of the claret from me, metaphorically speaking. So I'm bit peakèd if not actively piqued.

Rest and three more days off will do a lot to lift my spirits. In the meantime, we all have nature's favorite masked banditos to carry us.

Happy Thanksgiving, Americans. For everyone else: it's the reason tomorrow is arbitrarily "Black Friday." I'm sorry we've imported that to you, if we have. I'd prefer it if we'd just left you in peace, but if you're European, we could have said the same for the indigenous Americans 400 years ago when you started on your bullshit, so really you brought it on yourselves.