How Can I Convince Her That I'm Invented Too?

Things are now starting to wind down with my first post-marriage girlfriend. We knew from the beginning that it wouldn't be forever. There are just too many complications and we're both too old, her especially, to let things like feelings knock us off the path of what we must do. Seriously, she's like 70 or something.

We're both slaves to our obligations, unfortunately. It's the oldest story going. I'm a newly-single father of three boys, bound by fatherly obligation to keep them in an environment with which they are familiar, close enough to have access to their mother and maintain a level of sane security that will help usher them through this time of upset and trauma. And she, well, she has a staff of four people just to manage all her hats. And the ribbons at the opening ceremonies for refurbished wings of hospitals for racehorses, do you think they cut themselves? And all she has to do, she has to do with the embarrassment of living tax-free on a giant pile of money ensuring no descendent of hers will have to put in an honest day's work for a thousand years. That's a lot to carry around. I've seen it up close and the emotional toll is harrowing. Especially with no makeup.

I live in California and cannot do otherwise. She is London-based and... well, she's really free to do whatever she wants what with no job and unlimited resources. But the sunlight out here, it just doesn't agree with her. Sometimes if she's backlit just right, she's like a barreleye fish. I find being able to see her internal organs working endearing. Children, however, they will sometimes scream.

So she's going back. I imagine it's for the best. I can say I've learned a great deal about myself during out time together. I've learned that I can be a fully-realized adult, able to express thought-out opinions in adult company. I learned there exists a world outside of just family and routine, exploding with nearly infinite possibilities and admixtures for entertainment and culture.

Lastly, and most importantly, I learned that the very nice men with Royal Protection will not give you two warnings when you approach their charge's car in the dark of night with your hands in your pockets. Very professional, those lads, not very apologetic, but johnny-on-the-spot with the call for emergency services. I'll miss you guys. I only wish you'd missed me.

Goodbye, HRHAPRUKGBNI. You've given me so much. I guess the best way to sum it all up is to say, I would have taken a personal check.